Funny Fuck T-Shirts: For Those Days You Feel Super Inappropriate

Funny fuck T-Shirts. Sometimes you just need to have the F word on your outfit. Hopefully, it’s not your choice for your 5-year-old nephew’s birthday party. But, out at the bar on the weekend? Sure throw it on.

I cheated and added sanitized fuck t-shirts as well, because your mind is perfectly adept at filling in the blanks. So, you’re gonna see some F***, etc.

Remember when Sam Rockwell said “fuck” on the live SNL broadcast. Scandalous. The FCC rules on cursing on public television do seem somewhat antiquated. I guess you have to have a semblance of standards on public airwaves that the government maintains with taxpayer money.

But, with streaming and cable, do we really think the children aren’t getting more than enough smut, unless their parents are hyper vigilant. It seems like a late night comedy sketch show should have some leeway.

Though, maybe having the rule provides creative tension. You have to make it work without resorting to curse words. Might be a good thing. Judging from the reaction to Mr. Rockwell’s f-bomb, the rules mean something to a lot of people, if not something to find licentious when it happens on live television.

FCC guidelines expressly state that you can’t say seven words on network television. I didn’t read those guidelines but I remember the old George Carlin bit. Wouldn’t you like to be in the room when the FCC team and the lawyers get together to hash out the new and improved rules? Do they go word by word? Are the words on Powerpoint slides?

Okay everybody. Focus. We have a lot of dirty language to get through. First word. “Cocksucker.” Where do we stand? Does it stay on the list? Let’s take a vote. All for keeping cocksucker on the list say “aye.” Opposed?

Cocksucker stays on the list.

Fuck T Shirts to Celebrate the World’s Greatest Word

High As Fuck T Shirt

T-shirts are a whole different story. It’s up to you if it’s a matter of what you can wear in public. I guess you probably couldn’t wear one of these to work. Some retail establishments might choose to kick you out if you’re wearing one. It’s their right.

You probably don’t really want to wear these tees around vulnerable and impressionable kids. So, the opportunity to wear these is quite limited, which, again, makes the times when you can more special.

Like maybe you’re going to a party with adults. That might be an appropriate time. Or maybe you have a special date with yourself,  watching Saturday Night Live, and eating gelato. Go crazy and wear one of these.

Wear Fuck Tees Make Friends For Life

If you’re willing to wear a tee shirt that says “fuck” in public, then it’s probably safe to assume you’re a certain kind of person. Wearing this shirt probably acts as a magnet to bring like-minded people into your orbit.

Good plan. Good way to make friends. It’s a classic technique. Go to gatherings where the topic or subject matter or reason for gathering is near and dear to you. When you go you will find your friends and allies.

You can also find lovers.

Use Funny Fuck T Shirts to Find the One

If you’re single and a potty mouth, it might be good to wear a fuck tee to get noticed by people you want to date.

I still remember asking Ben and Sheila how they met. Sheila was wild. Couldn’t settle down. Never found the guy that could match her energy and be the apple of her eye.

But, then she decided to purchase this tee. It was a big step. She had never worn profanity on a shirt. It seemed so permanent, while her constant cursing just faded away into the atmosphere. Still, something told her to buy the shirt. Whoop-Dee Fucking Do T Shirt

Then, it was a matter of getting up the gumption to wear. Yes, she was a crazy heart, but she had a code. She didn’t wear t-shirts with fuck on them. So, the shirt sat in dresser for months unworn.

Finally, one night, as she got ready to go out she got the feeling again. Wear the fuck shirt. So, she did.

She got a lot of nice smiles and nods. A couple of prudish disapproving looks. But mostly good vibes. Then Ben walked up. He was getting another beer. He was with friends at a table. He saw the shirt and Sheila saw in his eye a glint. He ordered his beer. He got his beer. He walked away. Sheila surreptitiously paying a lot of attention. Ben was cute and he was sure she recognized the glint.

He turned around as he was walking back to his table. They smiled. As the night was coming to a close Ben passed by Sheila and gave her a high five. Said he liked her shirt. They went out into the brisk Des Moines early morning air, and talked for two hours. Exchanged numbers.

Had dates. Became a thing. Got engaged. Married. And recently celebrated nine years of marriage. All because Sheila knew she had to wear that shirt. Bob knew Sheila was the one at first site of her shirt. It was funny. She was funny and pretty.

Is it getting misty in here? Hip Hip Hooray for the word fuck on a shirt.

Teaching the Word Fuck to Children

I accidentally did this with my kid. Not having good impulse control, I used to drop the f-bomb at home all the time in the presence of my small child. The wife always gave me the side eye, which I brushed off. He’s too small to be soaking that in. Look he just slobbered on the cats ear and shit himself. No way he’s picking up language. Too busy.

Wrong. Kids suck up everything around them. It’s actually pretty incredible. They’re taking it all in and learning how to be functioning humans. My son certainly picked it up. He even knew it carried a little extra emotional oomph.

He was trying to open the sliding glass door at like 18 months. His hands slipped and he fell and he dropped the bomb. I’m not sure I’ll ever be forgiven for that. Rightfully so. Need to teach them more wholesome words that young. They can learn the dirty stuff from their friends in preschool.